So, we already talked about how you might find yourself to be in a long distance relationship. Or, in our case, an international long distance relationship. You might have also read our piece on 7 typical things that come with a LDR. While each of these posts highlighted some general characteristics there are a few specific reasons that show how a LDR really is a good thing – and what positive effects it might bring.

Like we already mentioned in a previous post, trust is the most essential thing in any relation. And in a long distance relation this takes on even greater prominence. Being in a LDR can make a lot of otherwise hidden insecurities come to the surface, and these "what ifs" can make life quite challenging in how they sap away your energy.

But it will get better overtime, the more you are seeing proves of this special bond between the two of you.

Not immediately of course.

But it will come.

Just like we also had to build this mutual trust (Story 2). Asiya, for instance, didn't take my words too seriously at first – when I spoke about my feelings or intentions. Because to speak is one thing but a persons actions are something else. Basically she needed time to know me more and in this time I made her feel at ease about us, that I wasn't playing with her and not meaning the words I said. After all, coming out of her previous marriage, how could she not have doubts.

When you're making big steps in your life it is normal to have doubts and fears – and being in a long distance relationship is a big step in itself. But these feelings really are just normal and if you don't have them it might be a telling sign that you're not really thinking things through?

Ultimately, ever relationship is about turning little doubts into stepping stones of belief. And in this way you both can climb and grow higher together.

There is nothing that build mutual trust more then when you can't always be with your loved one but see from a distance how he or she remains devoted to you. And when this LDR will be over you will have the best possible foundation for a happily ever after.

The importance of trust might not be the first thing on your mind when thinking about long distance relationships, but you it's a huge benefit in the long run. Building trust when you are separated by this distance is not an easy thing, and depending on the person it might take more or less time. The best way to keep building this trust is, of course, by improving your communication skills.

You will have to. There's no escaping that.

And listen, we don't mean to imply that you don't have any skills in this department before you began. Of course not!

What we do mean is that being part of a long distance relationship and building it together will make you work on those communication skills you already have and make you refine and improve them. Not only your own ways of talking and relating, but also by building this shared communication between just the two of you.

Let us explain…



We all know how easy it is to misunderstand someone's message, even when the person is physically present. Tone, timbre, little signs that convey the meaning of the message,… all these things are lost when using just text messages.

Of course, you will try to be face-timing as much as possible, but still, sometimes a wrongly understood meaning might make things unclear. Like how Stijn only afterwards realised that Asiya's Russian way of communicating was much more functionally direct than his own diplomatic Belgian style.

And that is ok, as long as you realise that a misunderstanding is first and foremost a reason to learn and grow. The more you talk, write, send or relate in any way possible, the better you will be at reading the other person's intentions and not make wrong judgement calls. Even if you would make them still – see these things not as errors but as an option to grow and develop and speak each other's language.

And this is one of the best positive side-effects to have, that in the end you will be so strong communicators, having developed this better then most "standard" relationships.

Nothing says 'commitment' more than spending a part of your life connected and being together with a distance between you. Just like we as a couple grew through this experience, so countless others have also shared this separated life.

You know that both of you are putting in the effort, an effort that takes much more energy than that of a regular couple. You see, hear or notice this effort every day and it makes for a very good foundation.

As a little side note, being in a LDR involves a lot of talking. Since there is less possibility to spend some time doing "really nothing at all" chances are in this long distance relationship you spend significantly more time discussing feeling, events and other meaningful things. A "normal" couple might mistake their close proximity for closeness but being in a LDR teaches you the real meaning of being "close". As you do this together, it also shows the deep level of commitment each of you has for the other.

Maybe one of the questions that are asked most of the time revolve around the generic "but how do you do it". We list a number of things we enjoyed in another post right here, so let us focus right now on the general positive side effects of this need for creativity.



Since you can't be physically together all of the time you will (because you have to) create different ways in which you'll both keep the sparks flying. No matter how far you are from each other – in our case just 2.000km with 6 countries in between – if you can develop different ways to connect and bond with each other, all will be well.

And the best part about it? You will.

Because this love, and the distance, will draw out your creativity.

What we did? Specific details you can find right here, but we did virtual trips, had themed dinners,…

Feel free to reach out and share your ideas with us as well – we love nothing more than to hear from you guys. And the most beautiful side of this is that by being creative in showing your mutual love you develop this very own personal communication style together.

(And make so many special memories in the process!)

We all know that relationships consume a lot of time, and this doesn't necessarily has to be a bad thing. After all, what greater joy can there be to spend time with your loved one. Being in a long distance relationship will make people enjoy and cherish these moments even more.

But there is more to life than just your significant other, such as friends, family, work and also hobbies. One of the benefits of a LDR is that it challenges you to focus on your own life and improve this as well.

Maybe at the start of a long distance relationship it might feel like an unpleasant side-effect: this time you have to yourself. But after the first month(s) you will start to appreciate the time you have left to spend it with friends, families or just on yourself. We all have an innate need for balance in our lives, and one of the advantages of a LDR is that it gives you this personal freedom to focus on so many things more than only on our relationship. Something that with "regular" couples can be easily overlooked.

Just make sure to also include your partner in these things as well, so you can really make these personal moments a (somewhat) shared experience after all. The best of both worlds!

Overcoming all these challenges that come with having a long distance relationship will make you grow as a person. You will learn to be more patient, understanding but your also be more persistent about the things you want in life.

We've said it before but since it is so true we'll happily say it again – Try to look to all challenges as invitations to grow both as a couple but also individually.

Having a relationship in which intimacy might be different than in more "regular" couples, you will grow a deeper understanding of both yourself and your partner. We believe that couples who live apart for a certain time will develop more meaningful interactions, because more shared time is spend on talking things true. And not only will it make your relationship grow, it will also make you as in individual be challenged to grow.

Fancy yourself having a go at a challenge? Well, let's say that if – in general – you can survive this your relationship will in all probability be able to survive anything.

You have mastered the fundamental aspects of trusting the other person, of learning to communicate even through all these distance-related obstacles. You showed each other your commitment and your creativity,…

You got this! And you can be assured of each other, ready for the rest of time together.